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Thanks, Mom

My mom really likes the Adventures in eating section of the blog.

I went back home recently and found that my mom had picked up a couple weird things for me. She saw them in a store and thought I would be interested, and she was right. I’m not doing anything special this week, Mom, so here’s an early Mothers’ Day present.

——–

I’m shooting outside this week, because it’s nice out and my house is too messy.

Let’s start off with the less scary of the two products.

Smiling Fish Brand Green Curry Fried Mackerels

Sure it’s kind of weird, when you think about it, but look at that smiling fish. He seems thoroughly pleased with himself.

And, I actually like most canned fish. Here’s some kippered herring from the “I actually want to eat this” section of my pantry.

I eat this kind of stuff all the time.

Seems pretty standard. (And thanks for the warning that it contains fish)

OK, enough talk. Let’s crack it open with the convenient pop top lid.

Alright, I’m not going to lie. That’s a bit gross. I’m a little worried about the bones too, because they seem larger than in other canned fish products I’ve eaten.

Immediately it smells like catfood, but then again so does canned tuna. Deeper into the whiff I notice a strong curry smell, but it’s really not a bad smell as all. It sort of smells delicious.

And then we go back to the presentation.

Oh canned mackerels, you really lose a lot of points in the looks department. You look like a rotted broom handle that someone tried to glue back together with turkey gravy.

LET’S DO THIS!

Holy mackerel! It’s good!

It’s actually very good. The sauce is fantastic, with a little more kick than you’d expect, and the fish is definitely not overwhelming. Even the little bones are not a problem. Very delicate, they give way readily and just add a bit of texture like sesame seeds.

I recommend trying this. It’s the best canned fish dish I’ve ever eaten. I’m actually going to go stock up on this.

———

Oh crap. I still have another product.

Fermented Lettuce.

This one I’m not nearly as excited about. I generally don’t do well with fermented things. I know this is the product Mom really wanted to know about, so there’s no backing out here. Maybe I’ll feel better about it if I check the date on the bottom of the can.

Ah, come on! That’s not even a date.

Pigeon Brand, in case you were wondering

Freshly opened, it is not what I was expecting. I expected something that looked more like creamed spinach. All wilted lettuce leaves in soggy lettuce juice.

This is more structurally sound like  lettuce hearts, or maybe it’s actually bok choy.

Man, they really pack it into that can. This picture reminds me of a jar of something preserved in a mad scientist’s lab. Maybe it’s the science glass I’m using.

I’m not drinking it. I’m smelling it.

It’s hard to place, but quite strong. Asparagus… Earthy… Gamey… Vinegar… Like a zoo, but creamier… Like a creamy zoo?

Not as “fermented” as I expected. I’m not getting any alcohol smell, more pickled.

You can’t see it in this picture, but I ate a big piece.

Maybe too big.

At this point my brain is yelling out flavors, while my mouth is filling up with so much taste. “Cabbage! Clay! Green Beans! Bitter! Cedar!…

…Bitter! Expired butter! Overcooked broccoli! Frog piss! SALT! Pickles! DID I SAY BITTER YET‽”

Bottom line, it tastes like really old lettuce. And really old lettuce doesn’t taste good.

Not a fan.

But I still had mackerel left over. So I ate that for lunch, and it was good.

——–

Check out more “Adventures in eating.

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14 Comments leave one →
  1. March 31, 2012 5:29 pm

    Loved the post! It made me laugh!!

  2. March 31, 2012 5:31 pm

    You are a brave man eating that canned broom-handle w/ turkey gravy. Couldn’t look nastier, but I guess I’ll take your word for it that it’s good. I like the play-by-play with the photographs!

  3. March 31, 2012 5:37 pm

    gross.

  4. March 31, 2012 6:03 pm

    Very entertaining. Great pics!

  5. Chatter Master permalink
    March 31, 2012 7:13 pm

    Oh this was too enjoyable. Your description of the mackerel’s appearance was top notch poetry, and accurate.

    I appreciate your mom’s taking advantage of you!.

  6. Tiffany permalink
    March 31, 2012 10:13 pm

    Ha! Hilarious.

  7. Liz permalink
    April 1, 2012 10:38 pm

    I’m a little thrown by the naked face.

  8. mark Hepworth permalink
    April 2, 2012 7:02 am

    Welcome back face. I agree that your description of the fermented lettuce taste was hilarious.

  9. Deborah Hepworth permalink
    April 2, 2012 9:12 am

    Oh, I love that you gifted me this for Mom’s Day…perfect. Particularly like the facial expressions after the BIG bite of yummy lettuce. I giggled a lot! Thanks!!
    PS. you look mighty youthful w/o your hairy lip

  10. Aletha Hicks permalink
    April 2, 2012 9:25 am

    Perhaps the lettuce had been left in the field too long prior to being harvested. That can sometimes change the flavor. I am sure that being in a can for an unknown time (no date) and being from Bangkok had nothing to do with it. Or it might be the Pigeon brand. I prefer the Penguin brand. They use iceberg lettuce.

  11. amy Brandon permalink
    April 2, 2012 11:13 am

    Love the food section too!

  12. April 3, 2012 5:19 am

    Love the reaction shots. Old lettuce…uck.

  13. An to the Drew permalink
    April 11, 2012 11:40 am

    Hey, frog piss isn’t so bad

  14. April 23, 2012 8:07 pm

    The hotel we stayed at
    in england had pickeled
    mackeral on their breckfast
    buffet. I thought it was good.
    Be grateful there wasen’t a
    cat around – they will crawl
    down your throat for that
    stuff.

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