More Bugs w/ Jami
This time, I have a special guest! My friend Jami, stopped by with some bugs. She wanted to try them with a friend and, for some reason, thought of me.
Oh boy! This is going to be fun.
Crick-ettes, Sour Cream and Onion Crickets. How nice of them to flavor these like traditional American junk food.
I thought they would just pour out, like a package of crackers, but they’re in a stay-fresh pack. That’s good. I wouldn’t want any bugs to get into my bugs.
We cut them open and each took a whiff.
Jami thought they smelled like a farm or a stable. But not the manure. We decided we were focusing on a hay-like smell. Very grassy and dry, and slightly gamey.
It’s a very strong smell. It almost gave me psychosomatic allergies. There’s almost no sour cream or onion odor, and I’m looking for it.
Here’s a close-up. As you can see, a lot of the legs have fallen off.
Last chance to back out…
Never! We dove right in.
The back teeth is the way to go here, I think.
The first thing you notice is that it’s surprisingly hollow. Very light, crispy, and no insides to speak of. Then comes the dryness.
These are the driest of the dry. It splinters like a peanut shell. Kind of stabby too. It’s brittle, but sharp.
The microsecond of sour cream and onion flavor is gone in a flash.
We had several while discussing the flavors. There’s not much to talk about, though. The flavor is very much like hay or grass. It’s like eating a tiny dry leaf.
This is Jami going back for a drumstick.
Wow, so they really tried to add flavor, but failed miserably.
The texture was the predominant part of the experience. Wingy.
Not worth it. Just eat a few pencil shavings, and you’ll get the idea.
Larvets, Cheddar Cheese Mealworms. They seem like they’ll be crunchier, and more interesting.
There’s not as many moving parts, so I have a meatier, chewier expectation. Less stabby.
These are the Cheetos of the animal kingdom.
First smells are not promising.
It’s again a barnyard, but this time it’s the whole yard. Jami says, “a state fair on a hot day.” It’s got a dry heat behind it. And a little bit of a birdhouse, too.
Basically, they smell like the crickets, only much stronger. And once again, no cheese.
We pick up a few, and find them hard to hold. They’re light, smooth, and covered in talcum-powdery cheese stuff. It makes them a little slippery.
The texture is even more hollow than the crickets.
The flavor is best described in this direct quote from Jami.
“OK. When it first touches your tongue, you do get a bit of cheddar chee- uuughck-ck-cklllggchk…”
Jami had just experienced the aftertaste, and above is a picture of me doing the same.
They shatter like empty popcorn kernel shells. Then, while you’re looking for them with your tongue, BOOM! Aftertaste! It’s like french kissing a horse, but much much drier.
Like frenching a freeze-dried horse.
And the aftertaste is so unexpected, because it’s a full 5 seconds after the mealworm is completely gone. You’re thinking “Oh, that tasted pretty much like a little bit of cheese and then nothing. That was alright.” Then suddenly your mouth fills with the scent of gutter leaves and earthy dirt.
That said these were definitely more cheddar cheesy than the crickets were sour cream and oniony.
I agree. “No thank you.”
But now I know that pretty much all bugs taste the same.
You’re going to get leaves and dirt every time you eat a bug. Just different quantities.
Thanks for reading. Check out more “Adventures in eating.“