Raisels

This one was purchased at Grocery Outlet (abbreviated “the Gross-Out”). If you’re not familiar with Grocery Outlet, it’s where groceries go to die.

Raisels: The Fruity Flavored Raisins! Because raisin-flavored is not a fruit.

Oh goody! A free joke with every purchase? I would like for you to know that there were six boxes in a package, and they all contained the same joke.

Plus, Raisel Empire?! I don’t get it. You changed the only word that makes your punchline relevant.

Let’s check out the ingredients. Well… at least Raisins are the first ingredient. That’s good, right?

Here’s a close-up so you can see exactly how much sugar is on each raisin. I also wanted to be sure to get the word “Healthy” in frame.

As soon as I opened the box, I was punched in the face with orange Lysol odor. Seriously, you could just open a box and use it as an air freshener.

Oh right, I’m supposed to eat it.

After a recent streak of bad new food experiences, I’m understandably wary.

Of course they taste good. It’s freakin’ candy.

It’s what Sour Patch Kids would taste like if they were made out of raisins. Still delicious, and nothing at all like raisins.

P.S. 66% sugar by weight. Holy crap!

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